Posted: 2017-12-04 21:53
I feel like the good doctor is missing the point. Broadly speaking there are two kinds of males who don 8767 t have sex: males who are virgins because they don 8767 t want to have sex (because of religious beliefs, lack of sexual interest or whatever) and males who want to have sex and (for whatever reason) still are virgins. The first is obviously not a problem, but i have to disagree with the opinion that the second one is not a problem. Perhaps this is a cultural thing (i 8767 m living in europe) but for me 8775 being a virgin 8776 for the second group is not mostly about nonsensical societal expectations to have had sex at a certain point in your live or the believe that having sex for the first time will magically make your life better, but rather that 8775 being a virgin 8776 past a certain point is a shorthand for underlying causes and the serious implications that follow from them.
Stop trying to validate yourself with a man you say you don 8767 t want, it 8776 s pathetic. First wife, I 8767 m the only wife, please!!!!! He wasn 8767 t committed and ready when he married you, and he still isn 8767 t committed and ready while married to the other woman, you might have been a wife 8775 best wife 8776 but you never had a husband. GOD didn 8767 t put you in that marriage immaturity, and bad decisions did.
Good morning Marilyn, I have read all the great advice you have given, but don 8767 t know if you can help me or not as I live in Scotland. .although I am hoping process is very similar to England? My question is that my ex-husband petitioned for divorce. The case was then sisted unti we agreed the financial position etc. We now have a court order in place agreeeing finances and that I custody of our son. The sist was then lifted to allow the divorce action to proceed undefended. My ex simply has to file affidavits with the court, but he will not do so. We are both living with a new partner and have been separated for 7 and a half years. He is simply dragging his heels out of badness because he knows I have a wedding booked. My lawyer has tried to push matters along, but it has costs me thousands and I am no further forward, and getting deeper and deeper into debt trying to pay legal expenses. Can you advise if there is anything I can do to try to progress divorce action. Many thanks
Some people don 8767 t mind the ex presence but it 8767 s such a sign that hey cannot live together or apart either best of luck. I wish I would been strong enough to tell him it 8767 s me or her but I 8767 m afraid I know the answer already and it hurts just thinking about it so confirming it I 8767 m not up for it for now but will be soon, my therapist tells me he 8767 s been to therapy with me and he 8767 s not want to recognize anything or change so she told me to stop coming so basically we are already over I think just of question of when sad but true, I 8767 m not willing to put up wi disrespect I did it too much
I was the one who left the house, but she had left the bedroom. She said she would not chase me but it exactly what I desperately needed. I needed to feel wanted and desired still do. With each day we are apart the distance grows wider. She can 8767 t believe that I left when we could have worked on whatever it was that needed fixing if I had stayed. I can 8767 t change the decision to leave anymore then we could erase years with limited intimacy. Sometimes the dog needs to hear the owner calling out with a treat in hand to remember why he need not run any longer. Nearly 8 months have passed and we 8767 ll never get that time back.
If you can 8767 t have kids, and your man no longer wants you, wouldn 8767 t it be best to know that before getting married? In a perfect world, it wouldn 8767 t be a factor and they could adopt, etc, but obviously it 8767 s not a perfect world or this discussion wouldn 8767 t be taking place. People in hell want ice water, but such is life. What we want or think should be isn 8767 t always so. People who feel they can withhold information that will affect someone else 8767 s life in such a grand way are lacking in integrity. They are self serving, lying by omission, untrustworthy, feckless individuals hiding behind the shield of 8766 privacy 8767 . There is an unwritten moral code to be honest with the person you claim to love, with whom you want to spend the rest of your life with, about things that affect the both of you. We all have little secrets or tell little white lies, but come on now.
I am divorced and there is no financial agreement between my ex-wife and I. I have tried on two separate occasions to resolve the matter but my ex won 8767 t engage or respond to any correspondence from solicitors at all. This obviously has cost me a lot of money and I cannot afford to pursue it. I have since re-married so know that to make a claim on the marital home I would have to do a TOLATA. After all this time, the last time being 7557, does she still have any claim on my pension and home that myself and current wife live in?
I 8767 m not in contact with his family or friends and think maybe they might 8767 ve been glad about his leaving me, we were so different so I don 8767 t think I can do that, though I dream of being able to sit in his family 8767 s living room and hear about him and how his life was these 8 years I 8767 ve missed, if he ever talked about why he left me But I 8767 m afraid they 8767 re happier forgetting I even exist. Someone above wrote that they were able to get some closure after talking to their ex 8767 s wife, so maybe someday I 8767 ll work up the courage to try it. I feel that 8767 s my only hope for letting him go. Sigh.
My son 8767 s father and I talk almost daily after the initial pain of the break up because most evenings he calls his son to say goodnight. Sometimes we just say hello, and sometimes we chat for a couple minutes. His dad and step-mom and brother still consider me part of the family, and invite me and my son over for holidays, as well as other occasions. Which is fine with everyone. Until my ex started dating seriously. His girlfriend didn 8767 t want us to ever be in the same room together, and would make things very difficult for everyone when there were family events like a great grandmother 8767 s birthday.
I have a strictly online friend/acquaintance that I 8767 ve known for 66 or so years. Absolutely nothing romantic between us, have only met once, and only communicate briefly via FaceBook every couple months or so. This truly angers my wife, and she says I don 8767 t respect her feelings because I haven 8767 t voluntarily ended communication with this person. My wife has full access to my FB account, and the discussions have never been flirtatious or inappropriate in any way.
I 8767 m not clear about the facts here so are you saying you don 8767 t want decree absolute but he does?
If you don 8767 t and won 8767 t apply, (and I think if you do, you will still need to file a sworn statement about your circumstances since 56 to date) then he could potentially apply for the decree absolute if you haven 8767 t since resumed cohabitation and seek costs. Or if too much time has passed and the court requires a fresh petition, he could apply to dismiss these proceedings and issue a new petition based on 5 years separation and potentially seek his costs from you for obstructing the original divorce?
Have you sorted your finances? Made a will?
That issue aside however, I believe there is much truth in Janet 8767 s overall observation. The threat to a cisgender man (or woman, for that matter) of losing 8775 social capital 8776 over being publicly associated with a transwoman in a romantic context is I think a real one that exists as a potent consideration apart from any of the behavioral manners or sartorial choices of individual t-girls. Your comment seems to come close to tackling this key and awkward issue, but never really quite does so.
Why doesn 8767 t your wife apply which she can do simply by filing her application as the petitioner and paying the court fee which perhaps you could pay or split? If that 8767 s not possible or if you prefer, you need to find out if the court dismissed your application in which case you have to apply again or adjourned it in which case you can ask the court to re list the application for a further hearing. Call in at the court and find out.
I am trying to get my consent order passed by the court, but they have rejected it as they said the amounts are unfair. My ex agreeducation to me having a larger percentage of the sale of our family home, as he earns 8 times as much as me and had more pension than me. He did not want to pay any ongoing maintenance which my solicitor advised I would be eligible for as we had beer married for 77 years. We both agreed to the settlement so what can I do to get the jugde to authorise it. Neither of us want ongoing maintenance, myself especially, as my ex is a gambler so I would rather a lump sum now. Also the money from the house sale is still being held by the conveyancing solicitor since last september and I am getting desperate now. Is this a justifiable reason not to apply for the absolute yet, it was due on 7th January. I hope you can advise me and thank you for all the advice on this thread which I have read previously. It is so helpful and informative. Thank you. Regards Lorraine
Taylor Murphy having been engaged to a trans woman makes him no less of a chaser in my opinion. That man likes his girlfriends packing and I ain 8767 t talking about luggage. But to each his own, but he 8767 s a chaser for sure. Being attracted to a beautiful woman is one thing, but not giving her a chance because she 8767 s cis-gendered is about as foul as not giving her a chance because she isn 8767 t cis-gendered!
I truly believe he 8767 s not doing the paperwork because he doesn 8767 t want to be divorced. I 8767 m not saying he wants to still be married to me, I really don 8767 t believe that, but I think he doesn 8767 t want to get divorced because he knows as soon as he does the clock will start ticking with the new girlfriend wanting to get married. He doesn 8767 t want to get married again, he doesn 8767 t want to have children again, he 8767 s told me this and he tells his friends this. When they tell him it 8767 s not fair to her because she 8767 s probably expecting that to happen he says it 8767 s not his problem.
You see, it is not just those of us who feel that a perfect woman does not need to have been born with, or even have, a vagina. That is not what we are primarily attracted to, it is the inner beauty we see when we look at them, that draws us to these women. When we see a woman that we are attracted to in public, we have no idea what is, or was, between her legs. We see what is there to be seen, her face, her figure, her fashion sense, even her personality, long before we ever get close enough to her to even bring up the topic of sex itself.
Observed in the proper way, each one of the seven days is important. These are not easy days, for sitting shiva is emotionally and physically draining. But this time is crucial both for the mourner and for the soul that has departed to the next world. Observing shiva gives honor to the departed, and the merit of the observance is an elevation of their soul. If part of the family wants to sit for only three days, so be it. Just go to your home after their shiva ends and sit for the rest of the days in personal mourning. You don't have to make a public statement about it, as you must be careful of their feelings.
HOWEVER as the new girlfriend you need to recognize whether your divorced boyfriend is actually taking appropriate steps. Recognize and acknowledge it before you get deeply emotionally involved. Some divorced men are not ready to sever the ties with the ex. Steer clear of them, it is condemning yourself to forever being 8775 the other woman 8776 and not the focus of your boyfriend 8767 s attention.
If she 8767 s such a good friend, maybe he would like to introduce you. Perhaps you could meet at her place of work and all go out for lunch after his massage? Someone how I doubt he will be keen on the idea but let 8767 s see. If it 8767 s all just good clean fun, they 8767 ll have nothing to hide. If he comes up with excuses, read my book and understand why men detach (and in that way tackle the cause of the texting rather than the symptoms)